Thursday, September 14, 2006

Status report = not good

I'm just going to put it out there at the beginning. I'm scared to death that they're going to cancel my cycle. I'm trying to be non-chalant about it and crap, but I'm not doing such a great job of really believing myself yet.

Had b/w on Tuesday (day 3 of stims) and my E2 had only gone from 25 to 31.6. Not much of a climb. But, slow and steady wins the race, right? Today was u/s & b/w. The Three Amigos are still there and getting a bit bigger, but not too out of control yet (at least that's the impression I got from the RE). Not much else happening on the R ovary (and I had such high hopes!). The left one has a few follicles and he went ahead and measured 2 of them, both <10 still though. I think there were 4 in total on that side. E2 has climbed to 85 though, so I'm hoping that things are finally waking up in there. I've shot myself up with over $1,000.00 worth of drugs so far, you'd think they could at least give me a little love.

Waiting to hear the instructions for tonight, I assume stay on the same dose. Good news is that tonight is my last Repronex injection, after that I'll be splitting up my daily GonalF dose into 2 injections. I'll be happy to see the Repronex go. The first couple weren't so bad, but the last 2 have left nice red welts on my belly and man is it sore! Holy crap! I just checked on the welt from last night and it's about 2 in in diameter. Yowza! Gotta find a new place to shoot that one tonight.

Physically, this isn't so bad yet. Probably b/c the follies are still small. I'm a lot more tired than usual, but then again, I'm getting up at the ass-crack of dawn to drive 45min to the clinic for monitoring so I can get home before too late so Hubby can get to work.

Emotionally, it's not so easy. I'm not nearly as cranky as with the Clomid (Hubby might disagree) but I'm a lot more sad. Not for any 'reason', but I find myself just - sad. For example, today, as I was leaving yoga class I realized that with not-so-wee-one starting preschool next week that I won't be back to yoga until my friend and I work out the carpooling thing. The kids are going to need some time to adjust to school so it's likely to be at least 2 weeks before I can get back to yoga. This made me very sad that I wouldn't be able to be there. I've missed 2 weeks in the past while out of town, but for some reason, this seems harder. Gotta love hormones.

UPDATE: I'm officially cancelled. They feel that the cysts/follicles are all that's growing and it would be pointless to dump more drugs in at this point. Now we wait until I get a period close to November 1 so I can try again. Pardon me while I go cry for a while. The more rational me will have to come by later.


RJ said...


Just linked to your blog from FF and wanted to let you know how sorry I am that you came this far, only to cancel. I hope you are able to start over cyst-free asap!


Heather said...

I'm so sorry that they cancelled it.

Take your time and cry it out - we will be here when you get back. Take care of yourself sweetie and know we are here thinking about you.

gabby said...

Nickie, Just wanted to pop over here and say I'm sorry. I know you must be really hurting now. I hope you can get rid of the cysts and have a stellar cycle in November. When you're up to it, I thought I'd tag you. May help pass the time as you wait for AF. (See my podcast page)

Linlee said...

We are in the same boat. My last cycle got cancelled on day 5 of meds. It's so hard to finally get to that point and have someone tell you that you should stop. My next round is supposed to start next Wednesday.
Good luck on your journey